The Dangers of the Alure of Fame

 

Enjoying our backyard

For those that didn't notice, in April, I stopped posting. Not only did I stop posting here, but on all my socials. Even Chris stopped posting. This is because we had a crisis of faith. Let me explain.

When Chris and I first got together a year and a half ago, we were both madly in love. He was the kindest, most loving man I had ever met. He wasn't perfect as he was also a broken man, coming off a 30-year, loveless marriage. But together, we helped him through those issues and he is a better man today than he was back then. One thing that we discovered is that we both have a passion for women's fashion. He loved buying me wonderful clothes (and he has great taste). However, being a man, he did know all the rules of women's fashion. Enter a dear friend of his, a woman who gladly offered to help him. Chris was/is very grateful to her but felt bad sending her pictures every day of my outfits. Finally, he got the idea of posting the pictures to Instagram. That way she would check them out at her leisure and still comment/provide pointers.  

Back to our origins

This was great, but soon we started getting followers and with Chris being an armature author, we came up with the idea of making it into a daily diary for me.  This started as a lot of fun. We would do a photo shoot every day and then we would sit down and edit the photo and create my journey entry, posting it that evening before bed. However, this soon became a bit much as it left neither of us any time in the evenings, and should we have plans, then we had to try to figure out how to get the photo done. That said, it was exciting to see our follower count rise and read all the wonderful comments. We both looked forward to seeing all the interactions with what we posted.

In order to free up our evenings, we came up with the idea of doing all 7 days of photos on one day on the weekend. It would take us 4 to 6 hours on Sunday. That included all the clothing changes and posing. Chris would spend Saturday running around on Saturday, doing all our shopping and errands. This didn't leave us much in the way of free time on the weekends. We still had to do the photo edits and story each night, but that took a lot less time. Even so, it was time. After a year of doing photos and stories every day, it began wearing down on both of us. We started to grow apart. I could really see it taking a toll on Chris. He was no longer as affectionate to me as he was before. I was really worried that he was falling out of love with me.

Communication is so important to a healthy relationship

Finally, one day I stopped him and we had a real heart-to-heart talk. The load of taking the pictures and writing the story everyday was getting to be too much. It was spring and there were so many things he wanted to do but felt like he couldn't as he had to do the socials. He pointed out that we had owned this house for two years and had yet to redo the backyard like we wanted or remodel the master bath. We both decided to take a break from the socials and work on our relationship. I am so happy to say that it was the right decision as our relationship is stronger than ever. He never stopped loving me, he was just feeling overwhelmed. We both want to keep posting to the socials, but we are not sure what form that will take. Whatever it is, it will have a balance between social media and our relationship. 

We started our social media as a way of sharing our passion, but it soon took on a life of its own and we started chasing clicks and likes. We lost sight was what we were really all about. I cannot tell you how thankful I am that we caught ourselves before it was too late. If you and your loved one have a social media presence, do not be like us and let it become more important than your relationship. Social media is not worth the love of your relationship.

Since our break from social media, we have redone our backyard, and it is wonderful. We spent last Sunday just sitting in our new backyard, drinking and talking.  

Here is what the backyard looked like before:


 And this is what it looks like now:
 

It was a lot of work removing those trees and their stumps, but it was so worth it.  Now, onto remodeling the master bath.

Anyway, I hope this acts as a cautionary tale and helps you remember what is important in your life.  

 

With Love

Katie

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